My understanding about royal weddings is that if you popped out of someone who had sex with someone who popped out of The Queen, your wedding day was a big deal that was blasted all over television for no less than 4 hours. Apparently that rule might only apply to the spawn of Prince Charles.
Prince Andrew’s youngest daughter, Princess Eugenie of York, is engaged to her boyfriend/distant cousin Jack Brooksbank. Their wedding will take place on October 12, 2018. According to The Daily Mail, if you want to watch that wedding next month, don’t tune into the BBC; you won’t find it there.
Now that Anderson Cooper and Jodie Foster skipped out of the glass closet, it’s mainly been occupied by the likes of Lilith Fair Barbie and Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street. Everyone assumed Bert and Ernie were splitting their time between their place on Sesame Street and a Fire Island summer share, and even the New Yorker used them on a cover following the Supreme Court legalizing gay marriage in 2013.
Mark Saltzman, who wrote for The Muppets for 15 years, is now saying those two definitely keep their Spotify playlists packed with Kylie Minogue remixes, if you know what I mean. But wait, the parent company of Sesame Street is out poo-poohing any idea that Bert and Ernie are life partners.
There’s a lot of ways to feel like time has just ripped by you like an asshole in a Ferrari. Like realizing we’re coming up on the 20th anniversary of She’s All That (yes it’s true). My recent “How long has it been?” moment came from E! News’s announcement that Benedict Cumberbatch and his wife Sophie Hunter are expecting baby number 3. Three?! Didn’t they just have their first one? No, that was over three years ago, although I’ll admit – they work fast.
Last night, Benedict and Sophie arrived at the Emmys and Sophie was working one of her signature “Bump? What bump?” gowns. According to E!, Sophie is pregnant. Congratulations on the newest otter pup, Benedict! E! doesn’t say how far long she is, or when the baby is due.
This latest baby could definitely kill the conspiracy theory that Benedict and his wife are nothing more than a PR relationship. Come on, Cumberbitches – there’s no way that dealing with three under-5 tantrums at the same time is worth any amount of publicity.
Benedict and Sophie already have a 3-year-old son named Christopher “Kit” Carlton, and a 1-year-old son named Hal Auden. Kit and Hal are the names of famous talking robots that help humans get from A to B. If that’s their criteria for name-picking, I hope this next one is named Garmin. Damn it, someone’s got to pay tribute to that helpful GPS robot.
Ratings hit a new low, and many shat on this year’s Emmy Awards for being boring apart from the winner who used his acceptance speech to propose to his girlfriend. Luckily, the producers also recognize nothing puts a smile on an audience members face like puppies and Betty White. Considering the how populated the Microsoft Theater was Monday night with gluten-free/oh-so-allergic actors and actresses, they went with honoring Betty and her more than 80 (!!!) years in show business. It was a smart call since everyone bent the knee in the spirit of Game Of Thrones to Miss Rose Nylund!
TVLine notes how Betty also channeled the late Rue McClanahan’s Blanche Devereaux by pawing up on Alec Baldwin and saying, “You think I’m gonna miss a chance when I get it?” Betty! Don’t waste your time on Alec when those hot pieces of GoT man meat are just two aisles over! Some people tried to say Betty sounded a little shaky, but I’d like to see their ass at 96 take center stage. Betty marveled how wonderful it was to have a career as long as hers in an industry “that will still put up with you…I wish they still did that at home.” Pish posh, Betty! I’d gladly put up with you for 96 more years over that reboot of Jersey Shore (or anything on TV, for that matter)!
Well, that didn’t take long. In all the fallout from Les Moonves stepping down as head of CBS, many were wondering what would happen to his wife Julie Chen, who awkwardly holds multiple hosting gigs thanks to her bed buddy, er, natural talent. While the Big Brother house is the best spot for Julie since, like evening hosts on Fox News, they don’t have a clue about what’s happening in the real world, her post as moderator on The Talk seemed in jeopardy since it seemed like her co-hosts supported her…but not so much her man. Julie Chen Moonves solved that one because she announced she’s done with The Talk in a recorded message that aired at the end of today’s show.
Want your movie to languish in development hell and be cursed by The Ghost Of Freddie Mercury? Then go ahead and hire Bryan Singer. I guess the good folks over at Millennium are fresh out of scruples and aren’t afraid of no ghosts because, according to The Hollywood Reporter, they are in negotiations with Bryan to direct Red Sonja, a movie based on a Conan The Barbarian comic book spinoff that was already made into a stupid movie starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and Brigitte Nielsen back in 1985. Get ’em, Freddie!