Remember when Miley Cyrus said that she was off weed and other shit? Well, the video for Mark Ronson’s Nothing Breaks Like A Heart featuring her (and her raw chipmunk ass cheeks AGAIN) will make you go, “Is that so?” Yes, the manufactured wokeness of the video is like the deeper twin brother of Kendall Jenner’s Pepsi ad, and I shook my head no at Miley’s Jesus pose, but I am into her look which is very “chorus member in Dynasty On Ice!” – Lainey Gossip
Okay, Starbucks’ new Juniper Latte doesn’t sound that bad, but I think I’ll save myself $15 and suck on a Little Trees dipped in Sanka instead – Pajiba
Dakota Johnson totally bought a Juniper Latte – Popoholic
Kid Rock randomly shit-talked Joy Behar, and my takeaway is that the douche equivalent of a Bud Light stain on an Ed Hardy cum rag wants to fuck Joy Behar and knows she’d rather fuck a porcupine – Towleroad
Rita Ora really could teach a Learning Annex class on how to try EVERYTHING until one of those things becomes a hit – Drunken Stepfather
Not pictured: the fish I feel sorry for because they have to share the water with Teresa Giudice – Reality Tea
Jay-Z totally dragged MAGA member Kanye West in a song, but totally wants you to think he didn’t drag MAGA member Kanye West in a song – Just Jared
Considering he has led a life that involved taking a chomp out of a bat and not exactly always being the best-behaved husband to Sharon Osbourne, I figured if Ozzy Osbourne ever died it’d be in some wacko reason – likely caused by Sharon or that bat’s offspring in a quest of Kill Bill revenge. Alas, Ozzy has trucked along for a while, but he did have a life-threatening scare recently – caused by the neighborhood manicurist.
There’s never been any love lost between 50 Cent and his 21-year-old son Marquise Jackson. Fiddy deeply, truly and unrelentingly hates his kid. So when Fiddy says he wishes his son would get hit by a bus, he really means it. Marquise, who seems to have made it his life’s work to troll his father at every opportunity, posed for a picture standing next to the son of Kenneth “Supreme” McGriff, a drug lord and who is currently serving a life sentence in prison. Problem is, Supreme is on the list of Fiddy’s sworn enemies. In fact, you might even call him his arch nemesis, considering Supreme almost certainly conspired to murder him. The picture was posted on Instagram and Fiddy was having none of it. He commented that he wouldn’t be upset if they both got hit by a bus.
I’m in Ptown this weekend (Yes, I know it’s still working hours. Shhhh.), and I immediately knew a half hour ago when Ariana Grande released the full “thank u, next” video because the entire street was filled with squealing as though Boston had just won the Super Series or whatever it’s called. And that was just from me. After what seems like weeks of posting cosplay from every RomCom made in the early-2000s, the video about being oh-so-grateful for exes has dropped, so it’s only natural Kris Jenner made the cut for the Mean Girls arc and not Lindsay Lohan.
So it looks like Nicki Minaj probably won’t be slipping a holiday card into Cardi B’s mailbox with a peace offer to bury the hatchet in the new year. Nicki Minaj clearly still hates Cardi as much as Cardi hates that her shoe-throwing aim isn’t more accurate, and she proved it by giving strip club bartender sisters Jade and Baddie G some major screen time in her latest video.
Next time you want to talk shit about your girl picking up some Payless shoes for a quick night out, THINK TWICE, honey. Because the retailer has just won the crown for being the trickiest bitch of the month. How did they do it? By finessing a bunch of snobby “influencers”. Justice thy name is Payless.